Joshua's Train Sets
This poem/free write utterly confused me, but was very interesting. It makes me wonder why is a train set-something typically associated with kids-so morbid? "ashes and plastic fires dance and swirl . . . the monstrosity creeps to life. . . stoic complexion crumbles. . . quivering coward" These are my favorite phrases and images from the poem. I think they work really well and hold intriguing imagery. I like that it's abstract, but maybe a little clarification would help. Like why their are bloody corpses? My advice would be to continue with the awesome imagery and sounds and mabye to clarify a little bit, but not too much. Awesome start though.
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