Surangi's Random Impulse
I could see him walking in my direction. He looked scraggy and worn out. His pointed beard made me want to run the other way, but I remembered my father’s words, “He’s a good man.” As much as I hated to agree with my father, I could see kindness in his smile. I could feel his gaze; he was looking straight at me. I could see a lonesome past through his eyes. I knew he would be different. I had been used, numerous times, as long as I can remember. I had always been a fool when it came to love, but I could sense it would be different this time. I knew he would be the fool this time around. After all, he had come to my father, the so called matchmaker, to find himself a wife. Now would anyone normal ever do that? If he wanted a wife, I’ll give him a wife. I will play him like a viola. He approached me and handed me the flowers he was carrying. As I reached out to accept them, I could feel the goose bumps on his arms. I knew I could have him under my control, but my father’s words kept playing in my mind, “He’s a good man.”
I thnk the repetitive "He's a good man." is good aspect to this story. The details are very vivid and clear. It flows very nicely. I would suggest adding more descriptions. For example, instead of saying "scraggy and worn our" describe it-his clothes, his hair, does he have a beard, dark circles under his eyes, ect. Why does he have to be the fool? I would definatley like to see you keep going with this story its a very good start.
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